Sometimes reading Arthuriana feels like reading Alice in Wonderland.
“Well,” said Alice, “these are a dreadfully strange assortment of objects!”
“They all symbolize different aspects of Our Lord’s martyrdom,” said the Fisher King, casting a line into his teacup.
“Indeed. I am sure everything symbolizes something else, for if everything was only itself I should be very confused. Might I ask what the point of the bleeding lance is?”
Alice regretted asking the question as soon as she had done so, for she saw the pun that would likely be made about the word point. Instead, however, the room erupted in applause and shouts of “The Grail! She has achieved the Grail!”
The next castle she visited, Alice resolved to herself as the inhabitants of this one danced for joy, would be more sensible.
“If you cut my head off,” said the Green Knight, “then in a year and a day, I shall cut off yours.”
“Certainly not!” said Alice. “For if you can survive such a blow, it would be quite unfair to me, and if you cannot, then I will have killed a man over a silly game!”
“Silly games are the most important thing in the world,” said the Green Knight, “for it is after them that we judge honor.”
Alice thought to herself that if this was honor, adults could keep it.
In honor of a thing that keeps popping up in Arthurian novels I read…
“You have nothing to fear,” said the robber knight, “for you are traveling alone. Everyone knows a knight may not attack a maiden alone, but only a maiden traveling with a knightly protector!”
“That can’t possibly be a law,” said Alice. “Camelot is absurd, but not that absurd.”
“It is not a law, but a custom.” The robber knight sounded as if he were lecturing a fool, which Alice felt was very unfair of him. “Customs are far more important than laws, for laws may change, but customs never do.”
Alice didn’t think that was true, but she would not argue the point.
“What about attacking a knight?” she asked. “Can someone attack a lone knight, or only a knight traveling with a maiden?”
“One may attack a knight any time and under any circumstance. That is the meaning of the word ‘knight’- he can be attacked by day or by knight!”
With the understanding that, as a maiden traveling alone, she might attack the knight and he could not return the attack, Alice picked up a handful of rocks from the ground and began to throw them at him. She was not generally an unruly child, but everyone has their limits.
For all those in the notes - peregrine falcons hunt by dive-bombing their prey; this falcon however is currently stationary and cannot dive-bomb much of anything. In this moment, the pigeon is safe. The falcon however may not recover from the embarrassment.
I can’t tell if that’s a giant pigeon or a tiny falcon
i hate it when i cant even write a poem about something because its too obvious. like in the airbnb i was at i guess it used to be a kids room cause you could see the imprint of one little glow in the dark star that had been missed and painted over in landlord white. like that’s a poem already what’s the point
you get it. you get the themes. i dont have time to do it justice. just look at it its on the ceiling
oh shit - i was time travelling and accidentally killed an ancient italian. doesn’t matter tho everyone was killing each other, when in Reme do as the Remans
My friend is trying to name herself, and she’s like, “Oh, what’s that name that’s like marmalade, but it’s a name?” and I know she means Adelaide, but I think I can talk her into naming herself Marmalade if I play my cards right here.
Not in a hateful, cruel way, but because my name is Newt, and I think “Newt & Marmalade” sounds like a detective agency that solves mysteries for tiny garden critters.
At some point as a child you start picking up that sometimes grownups just pretend to be impressed and amazed by something you did in order to encourage you to do more of it. What they don’t put together before being adults themselves is that the “holy shit you’ve grown” is not one of them. Like when you’re a kid you’ve been growing all your life, so someone pointing out that you’ve done it again every time they see you seems weirdly redundant, like yeah duh no shit, I literally physically cannot stop doing that, why are you shocked every single time.
But from the perspective of an adult who has no kids, small kids are essentially just cute animals. That will slowly animorph into an actual human being. And it is 100% just as astonishingly wild and insane as that sounds. Imagine going to visit a friend you haven’t seen for a while, and you hear something running to the door behind them and remember that they have a dog! That you haven’t seen for a long while either! No it’s okay no need to apologise, let me see the doggy!
HOLY SHIT IT HAS HANDS. SINCE WHEN HAS IT HAD HANDS?!
the tiger. she destroyed her cage. yes. YES. the tiger is out.
finally edited a few more alecto pics from way back at metrocon 2023 (i’m about 6 months late oops). maybe now we’ll get a cover reveal for alecto the ninth!
sword & photos by @shmaba, cosplay and editing by me.
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